Questions I received on relationships:

Question: What does a man look for in a woman?

My Answer: “Consolation” (fulfillment), as it says in the Torah (Beresheet 3:23): “Because she comes from me.”

Question: Should she be pretty and quiet, or should she just be herself?

My Answer: She should have everything necessary to complete “Adam.”

Question: In one of your articles you recommend your regular students to dedicate fifteen minutes a day to their wives. Is this so, and if yes, then what is the reason for it?

My Answer: Kabbalah obligates people to dedicate a specific amount of time and attention to their spouses. People today are busier than ever before, and hence we’ve set a rule in the group that besides taking care of the home and children, spouses have to sit down together and calmly talk for at least fifteen minutes a day.

What about you, are you able to speak with your husband calmly and on a daily basis? Does this ever happen?

Question: I got divorced two months ago. In a TV show you said that you are against divorce. I did everything to prevent it, but I’ve read some books and I know that Kabbalah says that sometimes people get married and have children, but their union is not “meant to be.” People get divorced and then find their proper match, someone who’s meant for them. Is this true?

My Answer: Kabbalah does not forbid divorce, especially in cases when one’s married life prevents one from attaining the purpose of one’s life in this world - the goal of creation. However, in other cases, it’s usually best to avoid getting a divorce.

Related Material:
Laitman.com Post: Woman = Desire
Laitman.com Post: The Only Thing That Can Justify Getting a Divorce
Article:  “Coming Together - The Real Meaning”
Article: “Eve - Just the Tool in the Creator’s Hands”

Filed under: Marriage - No Comments →

Two questions I received from beginners:

Question: I feel alienated from my material environment. I feel like everyone around me, even my close friends, are doing things that don’t matter. It’s difficult for me to have any contact with them because I view everything from the standpoint of the purpose of life. I feel like I don’t have any of the desires of normal society: I am not interested in money, sex, or honor. What is going on with me?

My Answer: You are still searching for yourself, your path and your goal. If you have tried to be like everyone else and couldn’t, then you are meant for spiritual development. Devote all your energy to it, and you’ll discover a treasure!

Question: Is it scary or dangerous to read Kabbalah texts if you don’t understand them?

My Answer: My advice to you is: If you are scared, then don’t read them! The people who study Kabbalah are those who need to understand what is the purpose of their lives, and at that point they are no longer scared of anything – they simply need this.

Related Material:
Laitman.com Post: Love Is Providing Others With the Means to Fulfill Their Point in the Heart
Laitman.com Post: Study Kabbalah, and the Spiritual Worries Will Outweigh Your Current Worries
Laitman.com Post: The Spiritual Goal Is the Same for Everyone
Laitman.com Post: Which Books Correct Us?
Kabbalah Today Article: The Gatekeeper

 

 Chapter from Book Attaining the Worlds Beyond: Spiritual Path [6:42m]: Play Now | Download

 

 Development of Desires [04:41m]: Play Now | Download

Filed under: Spirituality - No Comments →

Three questions I received on ritual observance and Kabbalah:

Question: To my regret, I was raised in a family that observed the Jewish traditions, and I even studied in a Yeshiva. Now I am completely secular, do not observe the traditions, and feel perfectly satisfied with this. However, I feel pressure from my environment to observe the commandments at the corporeal level. Can you offer me some advice on how to deal with this and how to avoid fighting with my wife (I am married with four children)?

My Answer: If a person was raised with the traditions and believes in reward and punishment for them, then it is very difficult to quit observing the traditions. Your wife believes that by observing the earthy commandments you earn the world to come for her and her children, and that you will receive a reward and the Creator’s benevolence. This makes her feel like her life has meaning and gives her the energy to live. Don’t take this away from her! When in front of her, observe what she asks for.

Question: I have been born and raised as an Orthodox Jew. I want to study Kabbalah, but I don’t want to follow the 613 Mitzvot. It feels really burdensome having to follow so many Mitzvot. At the same time the idea of studying Kabbalah is wholly interesting to me as well as the various concepts that you espouse on your great blog. How should I think about this matter?

My Answer: Without changing anything about you or your lifestyle, study Kabbalah, alongside the rest of the earthly Torah. We do not accept Orthodox Jews or even Kipot Srugot (knitted yarmulkes) into our core group, but virtual study is your right.

Question: I came to orthodox religion and left it after I failed to find the Creator there and realized that it was the wrong path. My question is: are there such things as a supreme judge and judgment, and reward and punishment, the way the orthodox believe?

My Answer: What exists is:

1. The Creator, the Law of Nature;
2. The creature; and
3. The connection between them.

The goal of creation is to attain adhesion with the Creator. The means to attain it is by correcting the creature from “for one’s own sake” to “for the sake of Creator.” Then the Creator becomes revealed within the creature. This is what Kabbalah talks about, and this is what exists.

Related Material:
Laitman.com Post: The Creator Does Not Have Arms or Legs
Laitman.com Post: Religion and Kabbalah Are Opposite
Laitman.com Post: Why Are There So Many Words In the Torah?
Kabbalah Today Article: A Mitzva
Baal HaSulam Article: “The Essence of Religion and Its Purpose”
The Secret Meaning of the Bible

 

 Video: Rabash - Which Torah & Mitzvot Purify the Heart? [14:17m]: Play Now | Download

Filed under: Religion - No Comments →

Two questions I received on why women don’t stay loyal to their partners:

Question: My girlfriends and I have been wondering why one man is never enough for a woman? Why is it that even if he studies Kabbalah, she loses interest in him after a while and starts looking for someone new? Isn’t monogamy natural for a woman? As a wife and a mother, isn’t she supposed to be faithful - a loyal companion for her man? So where does this desire come from to be with new men all the time? What should a woman do with this desire, and how can she change so as to be in harmony with nature?

My Answer: I think that you are disillusioned in your men. Apart from the minimal corporeal needs, fulfillment can only be spiritual. So find a man with whom you can study the book Shamati – and you will never leave him!

Question: Could you please comment on the following news report from Ethology.ru: The managers of the IllicitEncounters.com dating website made an interesting observation. In their opinion, the economic recession and men’s bankruptcy is causing more married women to register on their site in order to find extra-marital affairs. This phenomenon opens up a broad field for further research on how a woman instinctively behaves in the areas of family and intimate relations.

My Answer: The phenomenon is indeed instinctive, egoistic, animate, and natural. There is nothing strange about it. A female chooses a partner by his ability to provide for her and her offspring. In the animal kingdom, the female chooses the partner by his strength, rather than how handsome he is or because he has a “good heart” – the way people do in the movies.

Egoism is our only force. If you want something else instead, then ask the Creator to give you the opposite force – the force of bestowal. There are no other forces in nature!

Related Material:
Laitman.com Post: Shamati - The Most Valuable Book In the World
Laitman.com Post: Polygamy Is the Key to a Long Life – So Says New Research
Laitman.com Post: Polygamy - a Matter of Culture
Laitman.com Post: Don’t Look for Love In This World

Filed under: Marriage - No Comments →

The Book of Zohar. Chapter “The Sixth Commandment” (abridged)

219. The sixth Commandment (general correction) is to procreate and multiply (to correct new desires though the intention to bestow), for he who does so turns the stream (of Light with regard to Malchut), called Yesod de ZA (of the world of Atzilut), into an inexhaustible fountain (of Light into Malchut). And the sea, Malchut, shall be filled (with the Light from ZA) from all directions (in all of its corrected desires), and new souls shall come forth (will be born, will develop) from that tree (ZA, the source of Light), and a multitude of forces shall appear together with those souls, to guard them (so that they won’t yield to their yet uncorrected desires). Hence, it is written: “LET THE WATERS SWARM (Malchut will develop in the qualities of Bina) WITH SWARMS OF LIVING CREATURES.” This is the mark of the holy Covenant (ZA and Malchut, the Creator and Creature). The stream (of Light from ZA) grows stronger, turns into a river (because Malchut continues to correct itself more and more), and thus brings more and more new souls to life (bestowal).

220. A number of birds (angels) that soar above the whole world (qualities of Bina in Malchut) enter Malchut along with those souls. When a soul comes into this world (into the spiritual world), the bird that came from that tree (system of Sefirot) along with that soul accompanies it. How many angels leave with each soul (onto the next degree)? Two: one on the right (the force of bestowal, the Light), and one on the left (the force of reception, desires). If one so merits (if the soul merits its correction), then these angels guard him (they act together), as it is written: “FOR HE WILL GIVE HIS ANGELS CHARGE OVER YOU” (in the ascent, along the degrees of the ladder). Yet, if he does not merit (to correct himself), they report and accuse him (of this, and turn against him, compelling him to become corrected). Rabbi Pinchas said: “There are three angels that guard man, if he so merits, as it is written, ‘IF THERE BE AN ANGEL OVER HIM, A DEFENDER, ONE AMONG A THOUSAND THAT WARNS MAN.’ ‘If there be an ANGEL’ – is the first; ‘A DEFENDER’—is the second; ‘one among a thousand THAT WARNS man’ – is the third (this refers to the soul’s correction according to the method of the three lines – Gimel Kavim).

221. Rabbi Shimon said: “In all, there are five angels (the forces of man’s soul), for the verse continues: ‘there is one after the giver and two more, so in all there are five.’” He replied: “This is not so. ‘The giver’ refers solely to the Creator Himself, and not to an angel, for only the Creator is permitted to give, but no one else.”

222. And he who abstains from procreating and multiplying (correcting his soul) as though belittles the form that includes all other forms, the form of man, causes the waters (forces of Bina) of that stream, Yesod of ZA, to dry out, and harms the holy Covenant (Yesod of ZA) from all sides. It is written of such a man, “Go forth and look upon the corpses of the people (uncorrected desires) that have transgressed against the Creator.” Of course, those who transgress against Me. This is said about the body (desires), as the soul never even enters the screen, i.e., the Creator’s domain. And such a man shall be banished from the (spiritual) world (into our world).

Related Material:
“Introduction to the Book of Zohar.” Items 6-12

Filed under: Zohar - No Comments →

Two questions I received on the ego:

Question: What does it mean to hate the ego? Before we cross the Machsom, our entire nature is the ego. So doesn’t this mean that I’m supposed to hate myself?

My Answer: Kabbalah speaks to those people who start feeling a duality inside them: the ego that desires this world, and a point in the heart, which aspires toward the Upper World. Kabbalah helps one turn this point into a vessel for the reception and perception of the Upper World.

Question: During the morning lessons you often speak about the meaning of difficulties (the “guards”) that we receive. But what is the Creator’s objective in giving us success in corporeal things, such as a promotion at work, a perfect grade on an exam, and so on? The ego gets blown up when this happens. Should I try to suppress it or “go with the flow” of the success?

My Answer: You should control it: your actions should be determined by the importance of life’s meaning. And you shouldn’t refuse success at work or school. The intention of attaining the Creator does not conflict with career.

Related Material:
Laitman.com Post: Be Happy About Egoism’s Growth!
Laitman.com Post: First Become a Scientist, and Then You Can Speak Against Science
Kabbalah Today Article: Making Room for the Creator
The Kabbalah Experience: Chapter 5 - “The Desire for Pleasure: Discovery and Correction”

 

 We Shouldn׳t Fight Egoism [02:03m]: Play Now | Download

 

 What is Light in Kabbalah? [04:41m]: Play Now | Download

Filed under: Egoism - No Comments →

The Book of Zohar. Chapter “The Fifth Commandment” (abridged)

215. The fifth Commandment. It is written: “LET THE WATERS SWARM WITH SWARMS OF LIVING CREATURES.” This verse contains three Commandments. The first is to study the Torah (as it is written, “I have created egoism and the Torah for its correction,” which is achieved only through the study of Kabbalah, which attracts Ohr Makif – the Surrounding Light), the second is to procreate and multiply (spiritually; that is to say, to develop the point in the heart to its full capacity – the soul), and the third is to remove the foreskin on the eighth day (to make the corrections under the condition of complete bestowal, cutting off from oneself the work in desires that are impossible to correct – “Lev haEven” – the heart of stone, Zivug in Sefira Yesod, and not Malchut). And it is necessary to study the Torah on all the days, at all times, in order to correct one’s soul and spirit (to search within oneself for the Creator and for a dialogue with Him every minute of one’s life).

216. Because man labors in the study of the Torah, he corrects the other holy soul, as it is written, SWARMS OF LIVING CREATURES, referring to the life-giving holy soul, Malchut. For when man does not study the Torah (the method of correction), he lacks the holy (loving and bestowing) soul and the (quality of) holiness that descends from Above (from the Creator). Yet, when he does study the Torah, he merits its Light (correction and fulfillment), just like the holy angels (he merits full equivalence to the Creator, just like the angels; the only difference is that they are mechanical creatures, whereas man attains equivalence consciously, with his desire and efforts).

217. It is written, “Angels of the Creator (people who have attained the level of the Creator Himself, and who are hence called ‘angels’) shall bless Him.” This refers to those who study the Torah (correct themselves), as they are called His angels on earth (those who have corrected their desire, while in and of themselves the angels are qualities of Bina, the Creator, bestowal). It is also written, “BIRDS SOARING OVER THE EARTH.” This refers to this world. However, in the world to come, as it is said, the Creator will make them (those who correct themselves) wings like those of an eagle so they may soar (with their corrected desires of love and bestowal) over the whole world (over their whole egoism).

218. It is written in this regard: LET BIRDS SOAR OVER THE EARTH, for the Torah, called “THE WATERS” (the quality of Bina, love and bestowal) will SWARM WITH SWARMS OF LIVING CREATURES (will be filled with the corrected souls of people) from its place of life (the desires that feel themselves, their lack of correction), called Malchut (all the created desires), and all will descend down below (the intentions “for one’s own sake” will disappear and only the pure intentions – “for the sake of others” – will remain). This is what King David referred to when he said, “THE CREATOR CREATED IN ME A PURE HEART” to study The Torah (correct oneself), and “A HOLY SPIRIT (of love and bestowal) WAS RENEWED WITHIN ME (what was contained in the Thought of Creation now became my conscious aspiration, to fulfill myself).”

Related Material:
Article - “Introduction to the Book of Zohar. Items 1-5″

Filed under: Zohar - No Comments →

A question I received: I began studying Bnei Baruch Kabbalah through the arionline.info website in April. It appeared I had a set schedule and steady life for a time. Then I heard that a man studying Kabbalah should have a family in order to be corrected even further.

As I tried to find a mate, it put distance between me and my studies, and it seems that I was “handed over to a cruel ruler.” I ended my relationship with that girl, and I’m trying to get back to the studies, but now I feel as if my hunger to satisfy my corporeal urges increased 50 fold and now there’s a battle in me, and I fail each time. It’s as if Pharaoh gets stronger and stronger and my own self-hatred for giving in is getting bigger. I’m trying to see the Creator in all of this. What should be done?

My Answer: You lack a connection with other people like you. Only the group can help you get out of the confusing states correctly. Don’t fight egoism alone - it will always win! Or it will deceive you, making you believe that you won. Let’s talk when we meet at the congress in Saint Louis!

Related Material:
Laitman.com Post: The Consequences of Egoism’s Growth
Laitman.com Post: This Path Can Only Be Surmounted by Those Who Walk It
Kabbalah & Relationships - “Today, It’s Spiritual Relationship or No Relationship”
Shlavey HaSulam (Steps of the Ladder) - “The Importance of the Association”

Filed under: Egoism - No Comments →

Questions I received on the goal, the Ten Commandments, humor, Aviut, the point in the heart, and Torah and Mitzvot:

Question: One of our salutatory expressions is: “One Goal!” What singular word best sums up that one goal?

My Answer: Dvekut (adhesion).

Question: What is the Kabbalistic meaning of the Ten Commandments?

My Answer: Correction of the ten fundamental qualities of the soul.

Question: Could you please elaborate on how Aviut changes its qualities during Zivug de-Haka’a in each of the five levels, and what happens with Kashiut alongside?

My Answer: I explain this in great detail in my book The Science of Kabbalah (Pticha).

Question: Does humor have any value in the spiritual world?

My Answer: Yes, because it’s created by a combination of opposites.

Question: Can a Kabbalist see whose point in the heart has truly awakened?

My Answer: Yes. But more importantly, the person must feel this on his own and realize his point in the heart. He can do this by developing it in a group (being in contact with other points) and through study.

Question: In the Introduction to Talmud Eser Sefirot, Baal HaSulam says that observing Torah and Mitzvot is the attainment of real life. What does it mean to observe Torah and Mizvot for someone who isn’t religious and has no Jewish cultural background?

My Answer: It means to correct one’s natural intentions in all of one’s actions, from “for the sake of oneself” to the intention “for the sake of others.” This is done by means of Ohr Makif (Surrounding Light) that descends onto a person during the study of Kabbalah.

Related Material:
Laitman.com Post: The Solution - Excerpts from the Writings of the Last Generation by Baal HaSulam
Laitman.com Post: Kabbalah and Humor
Laitman.com Post: Listening to a Kabbalah Lesson Each Time Like It’s Your First
Laitman.com Post: Kabbalah Is for the Whole World
Chapter from The Open Book - “Freedom of Choice”
Shamati #25: “Things that Come from the Heart”
Buy the Book: The Science of Kabbalah (Pticha)

Filed under: Spirituality - No Comments →

The Book of Zohar. Chapter “The Fourth Commandment” (abridged)

208. The fourth Commandment (the basis of the universe) is to know (to attain in one’s corrected properties) that HaVaYaH (the One who created you and your desires, inside which you are now attaining the Light) is Elokim (the One who loves and bestows, the properties of Bina), as it is written: KNOW THIS DAY (in your mind) AND LAY IT IN YOUR HEART (in all of your desires) THAT HaVaYaH (your Kli, the soul’s body) IS ELOKIM (Bina, love and bestowal). That is, the name Elokim is included in the name of the HaVaYaH, and there is no distinction between them. HaVaYaH is ZA, and Elokim is Nukva. It is essential to unite ZA with Nukva by making their properties similar, so there is no distinction between them. Thus, the name Elokim of Nukva will be included in the name HaVaYaH of ZA, so that Nukva (man) herself will become as HaVaYaH (the Creator).

209. Hence, it is written, “Let the stars in Heaven shine upon the earth.” This means that both stars, the two names, HaVaYaH and ELOKIM, are as one. This way, Malchut (Elokim) should merge with the name HaVaYaH (ZA). The black Light (Malchut) with the white Light (ZA), as one, without distinction. The white cloud by day (ZA) with the pillar of fire by night (Malchut); the property of day (ZA) merged with the property of night (Malchut), so they shine as one star.

210. This is the sin of the primeval serpent that unites below but separates Above; hence, it caused what it caused to the world. What should be united Above, should be separated below. The black Light, which is Malchut, should be united Above with ZA into a single whole and then separate it from the “evil side.”

211. Nevertheless, one should know that Elokim and HaVaYaH are one, without distinction. HaVaYaH is Elokim. If man knows that all is one and does not cause any separation, then even the opposite, impure forces disappear from the world, instead of descending below.

212. The secret behind the word Me’orot, which consists of the words Mavet (death) and Ohr (Light), is that the impure forces follow knowledge, understanding, and thought. And this is Light, which is the opposite of death – Mavet, for the Light (Ohr) is inside death – Mavet (spelled as Me’ot) in the word ME’ohrOT. This alludes to the fact that Light separates death, but when Light disappears, the letters unite and form the word “death.”

213. Chava started with these letters, and brought evil into the world. As it is written, the woman SAW that it was good to bring the letters of the word Me’ohrot back. From there she took the letters Vav-Tav-Reish-Aleph, leaving only the letters Mem and Vav. And they took with them the letter Tav, thus forming the word Mem-Vav-Tav (Mavet – death). And they brought death into the world.

214. And look: Rabbi Elazar said, “My father, I have learned that after Chava had removed the letters VeTiR’E from the word Me’ohrot, the letters Mem and Vav did not remain. Only the letter Mem remained, for the letter Vav, which is the letter of life, turned into death. This occurred because it attached the letter Tav to itself, thus forming the word MaVeT.” He replied: “Blessed are you, my son!”

Related Material:
Article: From the “Preface to the Book of Zohar”

Filed under: Zohar - No Comments →