Laitman.com » Sex

Questions About Pornography And Health Concerns

admin_bb — Wed, 30 Nov 2011 11:16:06 +0000

Question: Can a Kabbalist like to watch pornography (gay and straight) if he finds it beautiful to watch people having pleasure, or is it something I should stop doing in order to live a spiritual life and be connected to the Light?

Answer: This will pass by itself, to the degree of feeling the importance of the goal.

Question: I have had health challenges for the last four years, and I’m only 28 years old. Physically I do everything as best as possible in terms of diet and exercise, and I still find myself worse off than people who mistreat their bodies with bad diet and drugs.

Why does this happen to a person who physically looks after themselves when other people who mistreat their bodies don’t go through the same health challenges? What should a person, who does everything to stay healthy and still suffers, do?

Answer: Possibly, you have to change your place of residence, job, and environment.
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In The Zone Of Choice

bb_admin — Wed, 03 Aug 2011 18:19:23 +0000

In the past egoism spurred us on from behind and from the sides, always leaving the path forward free. However, today the barriers are not arising along the sides, but in front of us. It’s as if a wall rises up before us, leaving us no place to run, nothing we can do.

This state is becoming more and more apparent: I don’t really want anything, I don’t feel that I can keep growing in my egoism. It is incapable of giving me answers to the questions that arise in me today. I have outgrown the previous phases and have entered the next level of questions, the level of adulthood and new necessities.

Food, sex, family—all of these are falling apart, taking on strange, “mutated” forms. Wealth, fame, and knowledge don’t seem to promise me a lot either.

Science is in a crisis and does not answer my questions, even though a mere 50-60 years ago it still seemed like it would give us answers to everything.

Power has become petty in our eyes: We see that its only objective is money. And money…. Is it really worth wasting your entire life on!? My questions have already outgrown any number of zeros that a bank account can display.

When a person loses the necessary “fuel,” emptiness emerges inside of him and he finds himself asking, “What is worth living for? For myself? But I lack fulfillment. For my children? But when they get older, they will leave the nest. And besides, why raise them at all? What bright future do they have ahead? Disintegrating families and a decomposing society?” A person does not feel attached to anything and does not have hopes for anything. That is the kind of impasse that our questions have led us to.

But there is also a completely different reason for the dead-end state: We are exhausting the natural resources. Today it is already clear that human progress won’t be infinite, both from the point of view of our demands and from the point of view of our existence as a whole. If we continue squandering the natural resources at the current rate, then very soon we won’t have any raw materials left even for the vitally necessary products.

90% of what we produce today consists of oil, be it energy, plastic materials, and so on. When the oil reserves end, we will be left with nothing. But nevertheless, we still keep on squandering it.

Thus, on one hand nature places a barrier before us in the form of ecology, climate, and resources, and on the other hand, egoism no longer pushes us forward. It asks questions that we cannot find answers to here, in our world, in this small children’s room where we had so much fun playing until now.

Today the situation already resembles suicide: We are irrationally using up the last remaining resources.

We have to understand that because of this, we find ourselves in the zone of choice. This is where freedom of will emerges, the freedom for us to start understanding the program of our development: “Who are we? Why are we here? What for?”, and together with us, the rest of the world. Now is exactly the time for us to solve this challenge. Otherwise humanity will find itself in a truly hopeless impasse.

In reality the gist of the problem is not the financial crisis, the technology crisis, or the crisis of families. We are in a crisis with ourselves. We have to understand who we are and what we are here for, both from the point of view of nature, which obligates us to this, and from our own point of view. Only then will we be able to set things right inside of us and in the world.
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From the Talk about a New Book 7/11/2011

No More Girls And Boys

admin_bb — Tue, 05 Jul 2011 09:08:11 +0000

In the news (from Associated Press): “STOCKHOLM (AP) – At the “Egalia” preschool, staff avoid using words like “him” or “her” and address the 33 kids as “friends” rather than girls and boys….

Staff try to shed masculine and feminine references from their speech, including the pronouns him or her – “han” or “hon” in Swedish. Instead, they’ve have adopted the genderless “hen,” a word that doesn’t exist in Swedish but is used in some feminist and gay circles….”

The school is especially careful in selecting books and toys for children. It strives to give children the possibility to be who they are and to prevent them from developing barriers that separate masculine and feminine activities.

“There’s a long waiting list for admission to Egalia… It places a special emphasis on fostering an environment tolerant of gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people. …Nearly all the children’s books deal with homosexual couples, single parents or adopted children. There are no “Snow White,” “Cinderella” or other classic fairy tales seen as cementing stereotypes.”

My comment: We are surrounded by what is called “Nature.” We know virtually nothing about its laws, reasons, and the goals of its and our own existence. Yet, our observations and knowledge show that everything is in the process of causal development, and nothing is accidental or redundant. Whoever does not agree with this demonstrates their unfamiliarity with the laws of nature.

Hence, all we have to do is to study the laws of nature and carry them out. This will guarantee our good future. A breach of a natural relationship between the sexes brings about tremendous suffering in children and, as they grow up, problems with sexual and social identity.
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Love Thy Neighbor And Nothing More

admin_bb — Mon, 27 Dec 2010 07:53:31 +0000

Question: An absolute majority of psychologists and psychiatrists state that sexual orientation is not something a person chooses, nor can it be adjusted. All attempts to alter sexual orientation have been unsuccessful.

Does a gay person have to re-define his or her sexual inclination in accordance with Kabbalah’s requirements? Does he have a choice?

Answer: Kabbalah doesn’t ask a person to make any changes on the material level. If the intention of a person is “to love his neighbor,” that is, to correct his egoism, then all his worldly actions will be right.
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Kabbalah Channel: Sexual Secrets And Spirituality?

admin_bb — Wed, 18 Aug 2010 11:28:35 +0000

Why Are People So Preoccupied With Sex?

admin_bb — Sat, 01 May 2010 19:26:59 +0000

A question I received: Why are people so preoccupied with sex?

My Answer: In the spiritual world, the soul is in the state of “Zivug” (coupling, merging) with the Light. This is the unity of two parts of creation, a male and female, which brings the greatest pleasure there is: filling the soul with the Light. A prototype of the spiritual merger in the material world is physical coupling. That’s why (attraction to the opposite sex) is considered a foundation, a root of all desires and pleasures of our world, and preoccupies us so much.

Sexual pleasure in our world beautifully demonstrates the difference between the spiritual and physical merging. A person (a man) thinks about sex all the time and envisages enormous pleasure that awaits him, but after the peak, the satisfaction immediately disappears. A chase after another pleasure begins again….

Why? It is because the Light and desire annul each other. In other words, by filling the desire, the Light neutralizes the sensation of pleasure, similarly to how plus and minus cancel out each other. The disappearance of both leads to double emptiness. That’s why it’s written, “Dying, a person does not receive even a half of the desired.”

Spiritual pleasure works within us differently. To be in the spiritual world means to have the intention (screen) – an ability to receive pleasure (Light) into a desire (vessel, Kli) in order to bring pleasure to the other (a friend, the Creator). That requires a person to acquire the property of the Creator, the property of love and bestowal. Then a person reaches the spiritual coupling, ceaseless merging, which continues and intensifies constantly, giving one the sensation of eternal life.

Essentially, somewhere deep inside, in the soul, we all unconsciously aspire to this particular merging, and are created for it.

Men, Women And…Chimpanzees

bbeditor — Thu, 01 Apr 2010 04:45:30 +0000

Question: Why are men and women always separated when they study Kabbalah?

Answer: The professional opinion of neurologists is that the difference between a male chimpanzee and a man is significantly less than the difference between an adult man and an adult woman. The genetic dimorphism is a lot stronger within the human race than between a man and a male Bonobo chimpanzee.

Question: The best donor for human transplants is considered a pig. Which animal brain is most similar in structure to a human brain?

Answer: If we take into consideration protein composition and DNA, we’ll see that it is very similar to a chimpanzee’s brain. For example, the difference in structural proteins of Bonobo chimpanzees that inhabit Western Africa and human beings is less than 1%.

The whole process of evolution is in fact an implementation of the desires of egoistic monsters who only wish to consume food, propagate (reproduce themselves) and dominate each other. This is how a pack of chimpanzees is organized and at the same time it is similar to how a human society is constructed even in the most democratic and civilized countries.

You Know It’s A Crisis When The Porn Industry Is Hit

bb_admin — Mon, 11 Jan 2010 12:12:47 +0000

In the News (from CNN): “Hard times for porn industry” The porn industry in the United States was worth around $6 billion before the recession but now estimates filming on new productions is down by as much as 50 percent.

My Comment: This is happening because people’s sexual desires are of less importance than the desires for food. Apparently the crisis is reducing the value of these desires and the importance of fulfilling them in the face of greater threats.

The Danger And Disappointment Of Virtual Affairs

bb_admin — Tue, 16 Jun 2009 11:00:44 +0000

In the News (from The Times Online): “Help, my boyfriend is using online sex chat rooms” – …model of cybersexual addiction – as defined by Dr Kimberly Young, an acclaimed expert on Internet addiction – shows that disinhibition, accelerated intimacy, and hypersexual online behavior are a pretty accurate predictor of real-world transgressions. Ellen Helsper, research fellow at the Oxford Internet Institute, University of Oxford, says: “Couples do not make a distinction between online or offline infidelity because the emotions, and the sense of betrayal, are the same.”

My Comment: Lack of criticism, fantasy, wishful thinking, absence of limitations and etc. are the dangerous attributes of virtual affairs. Kabbalah considers virtual connections to be genuine because they reveal the inner desires of a person. Unrealized aspirations are more dangerous than realized ones because they constantly chase a person, do not allow realization and are therefore followed by disappointment.

It’s said, “Сомнения согрешить труднее, чем сам грех” “Temptations to sin are more difficult than the sin itself” because doubts chase and never leave a person! At the same time, a committed sin leaves a person experiencing disappointment or at least reveals its imperfection, as with any other so-called fulfillment in this world.

Altruistic Men Are Sexier

bb_admin — Thu, 13 Nov 2008 15:35:34 +0000

News Report: The British Journal of Psychology has published an article called “Being altruistic may make you attractive.” In it, scientists from the University of Nottingham in the UK conclude that altruism, or in other words – selfless behavior toward others – makes men more attractive to women. In fact, women value altruism in their partner over any other quality.

My Comment: This is just regular female egoism: women like altruism in men so that men will make selfless sacrifices for them, the women! But it’s hard to find such naive, selfless “knights” these days. They’ve all grown smarter and disappeared hundreds of years ago. They overgrew the animate altruism and became egoistically practical!

Spiritual Sex

bb_admin — Sat, 13 Sep 2008 18:25:52 +0000

A question I received: Originally Adam had only one woman, Eve. Will we return to monogamy when corrected? Or will we not care when we are corrected?

My Answer: Sexual union in our world comes from the spiritual union between the Upper Light and the soul, called “Zivug de Hakaa” by means of a screen. In this spiritual union between the soul and the Creator (the Kli and the Light), the Creator or the Light is the male part which bestows, and the soul or Kli is the female part which receives. In the process of correction the soul (Kli) acquires the property of bestowal, and then it is ready to accept the Light in order to satisfy the Creator’s (the Light’s) desire “to bestow.”

The process of union (merging, Zivug – spiritual coupling) happens in the common desires of both “to fulfill the other with pleasure,” to feel pleasure only to the extent that will give pleasure to the other partner. Hence, what happens is a constant comparison of common desires and intentions (in the Rosh of the Partzuf, before reception inside its Toch), which becomes expressed in our physiology as the movements of sexual intercourse, preceding the outpouring of the Light of Hochma (Ohr Pnimi, semen) into the soul (into the Kli, from the Rosh into the Toch of the Partzuf).

These alternating and progressive mutual movements are meant to create a complete desire in each spiritual partner, by way of interrupting and resuming contact. This creates the possibility of wholesome pleasure: when this level is attained, the Light passes from Peh to Toch – the pleasure enters the desire, as written in the Torah: “As an arrow hits the desired target at the desired time, in the desired woman, and in the desired place.”

Thus, when one’s soul attains full correction, one views sex as the physiological expression of the spiritual connection. And if there is no spiritual connection, then there is no incentive or reason for a bodily connection.