Question: How can I check that my actions are actually in order to bestow, and not an illusion?

Answer: If it truly were an action of bestowal, you would have no doubts because the Creator would be revealed in it, participating in it to the same extent that you want to bestow upon Him.

The goal of an action of bestowal is to bestow upon the Creator. It is impossible to do that without the ultimate addressee. If such action takes place, you will discover to what extent you actually bestow upon the Creator, meaning you will discover Him.

At first the revelation will be in concealment, to bestow in order to bestow. It is hard for us to understand what it is because the intention to bestow in order to bestow is Bina, an action that is detached from our desire to receive. We can somehow imagine the intention to receive in order to bestow as something opposite to us. But if it is only in order to bestow, it is impossible to understand how you can live without any connection to your desire, as if you are hanging in the air.
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From the 1st part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 4/15/2012, Writings of Rabash

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