The Creator created only one desire, one vessel that remains in simple and complete unity with the Light, as one whole, without any division or differentiation. This was the plan of the Light that created desire, but this desire doesn’t express any personal reaction yet. Hence, there is only one soul, one creation, which is regarded as Malchut of the world of Infinity.

Everything else exists only in the internal experiences of this Malchut. It feels that the upper Light which fills it comes with love and bestowal, while it itself is opposite to the Light. Feeling shame, it restricts itself in order not to feel this Light inside, not to feel as receiving. The Light, in response to Malchut’s wish, seems to withdraw, leaving a void around the central point of creation, and Malchut remains empty. But all of this occurs only in its sensations while the state itself doesn’t change.

And afterwards, it hopes to receive the Light in order to bestow and breaks. In other words, it was eager to reform itself and to bestow to the Light just as much as He did in the world of Infinity: to bestow to Him infinitely! But it failed. What a disappointment and pain! After this, Malchut moves into a different mode: It drops the idea of becoming equivalent to the Light.

It had such an enormous, passionate desire to bestow to Him everything, till the very end! But having attempted to do so and failed, Malchut lost everything. It lost the power to bestow, broke, and moved to the force of receiving, to thinking about itself. Now, instead of receiving in order to bestow, it desires to either bestow in order to receive or receive egoistically.

It is totally opposite to what used to be in reality previously. But this entire drama unfolds only within Malchut, in its storming sensations. This is how it forms various relationships with the Light, which are regarded as the worlds of ABYA (Atzilut, Beria, Yetzira, Assiya) until, in the end, a new intention doesn’t surface in Malchut itself, when it starts thinking about bestowal once again.

It was led to this point by the chain of developmental genes (Reshimot, reminiscences) from the breaking it underwent. It feels so miserable, withdrawn, and empty that the relationship with the Light starts dawning in it anew. So, Malchut begins working to overcome this feeling of separation and awakens shame in itself willingly, wanting to feel how opposite it is to the Light: How entirely giving He is compared to how totally receiving it is.

It feels itself completely broken into tiny pieces, fragmented by their differences, separation, and hate. But this is precisely what allows it to reconstruct itself now, having repaired relationships between these parts, and treat them in the manner the Light does. Thereby, it acquires the properties of the Light, and in the degree thereof, it begins feeling love and bestowal to the Light.

When a person, one of the Malchut’s parts which experiences itself as separated from the others, comes to the group, he begins repairing his relations with all the other parts of Malchut. And if he works correctly, thereby he begins to discern what the properties of reception and bestowal are, as well as rejection, disdain, and attraction.

It turns out that instead of receiving all these meanings supplied directly by the Light, Malchut discerns them on its own, sorting out the relationships between all its broken desires. In other words, it uses the force the breaking and hate in order to understand what love and bestowal is. Thereby, it works on unification, having received “help against it.”

Wishing to unify all its parts, it brings itself back to the intimate relationship with the Light, to an ability to love and bestow to Him. And this is why it restricted itself and engaged in this process that started in the world of Infinity.
[38979]
From the 1st part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 3/24/11 Preparation for the WE! Convention

Related Material:
Who Decides: Desire Or The Light?
Help Me Wake Up From This Dream
Playing A Game Of Bestowal

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