The Creator intentionally confuses us with His governance so that we can’t find where it starts and ends, as if He doesn’t exist at all. But if He revealed Himself to me right now, my “self” would cease to exist since it is He who carries out and controls everything one hundred percent.

It is hard for us to understand that in the spiritual dimension, we simply don’t exist for our present nature is egoistic. My individuality begins emerging only when I start resisting Him. My spiritual reality starts with Pharaoh from whom I must take all his might. This is what we call “to resist the Creator.” Otherwise, how will I grow?

Later on, grounded in this resistance, I acquire the form of the Creator. However, it occurs in accordance with what I myself have planned having examined, discerned, and decided that this is exactly what I have to and should do.

Therefore, I have to include two opposites within myself: darkness and the Light, or I will never grow independent. That is why the Creator gradually awakens us by sending all sorts of problems to us so that we may aim ourselves correctly.
[29018]
From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 12/3/10, “Introduction to The Study of Ten Sefirot”

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